There’s something to be said about a cloudy day. Most people would complain, I disagree. Just light enough to see outside, no sun to blind you. Things seem clearer, to me, when it’s like this.
I’m not talking about a gray, nasty day, but one where the sun’s out, just hidden by clouds. But you know it’s there, and you can still feel its warmth…
Can kind of apply to all aspects of life, can’t it?
I’m tempted to go out tonight. But I know when the time comes I’ll doubt it… I really don’t want to lose it in public, especially if Will’s not there. I depend on him a lot, these days. Seems like sometimes, he’s the only one who understands how I feel. He lost Patrick, just as I did. It’s a little sad how all of this has seemed to bring us closer together. I feel more secure in my marriage than ever. (Even though the depression would make me think otherwise, at times).
And on that note, I definitely feel for anyone who’s suffered depression, true depression, in their lifetime. You always say you’re depressed, but when it actually happens to you, you’ll know it, and it will suck royally. Because there’s no logical explanation for how horrible you feel, which only brings you down farther… I’m just glad that my bouts with it have been easy enough that I can acknowledge it and not let it ruin me.
This is going to be a long day, I can already tell.